The process of parting ways with a once cherished individual is a challenging experience for both men and women. However, it is observed that the recovery period for men tends to conclude much more swiftly than that of women, often within a matter of weeks, while women may require over a year to heal.
German sexologist Frauke Höllering cautions against hastily assigning labels to individuals, yet acknowledges that there are notable differences in the post-breakup behaviors of men and women. Typically, a man’s inclination to pursue a new relationship shortly after a breakup is not indicative of emotional detachment, but rather stems from a logical and pragmatic approach. Many men become accustomed to the comforts of companionship and appreciate being pursued. Consequently, they do not necessarily seek an ideal partner; rather, they may settle for an interim figure, often referred to as a “comforter,” who is initially forgiven for certain flaws. This relationship may persist until a more suitable partner is found.
Research indicates that men are often prepared to embark on a new romantic endeavor as soon as four weeks following a breakup, whereas women generally require over a year to recuperate.
Post-Breakup Behavior of Men
A study commissioned by a dating website reveals that approximately one in four men quickly develops feelings for a new partner. The male psyche appears to activate a protective mechanism that shields their wounded pride, allowing them to move forward rather than dwell on past grievances. Rather than ruminating on previous mistakes, men tend to redirect their focus toward future possibilities, accepting the finality of the breakup and choosing to continue with their lives.
Post-Breakup Behavior of Women
In contrast, the male tendency to look forward is markedly different from the predominant female strategy. The aforementioned study indicates that nearly 40% of women require more than a year to process a breakup. This extended period of reflection often precludes the possibility of entering a new relationship. Many women view a breakup as an opportunity for personal growth and, instead of hastily seeking new love, they engage in introspection to comprehend the circumstances that led to the dissolution of the relationship.
Another significant distinction in behavior is that women frequently attribute the cause of the breakup to themselves rather than to their partner. They may perceive the end of the relationship as a personal failure, leading them to seek answers to questions such as, “What did I do or say incorrectly?” or “At what point could I have intervened to salvage the relationship?” This deep introspection often results in women spending considerably more time attempting to liberate themselves from emotional dependency on their former partner compared to men.
Expert offers the following advice for individuals seeking to avoid repeating past mistakes: “I recommend that individuals take time for solitude, provided they can manage this experience. It is essential to reflect on the factors that contributed to the breakup. If one is unable to identify these factors, it is likely that similar issues will arise in future relationships.”
